We Westerners don’t have a very good relationship with death. We avoid talking about it. Children are shielded from it. Lots of folks try to pretend it doesn’t even happen.
And then it does. And we’re left devastated.
The cycle of life has uprooted me several times over the years, and I am always left wondering: “why does losing someone have to hurt so much”?
Then one day, I was listening to the Lex Fridman Podcast and he admitted to the audience that he handles this emotional punch by taking a few moments each day to contemplate his very own death. He stops everything. He finds a quiet place in his mind and ponders the facts…
You won’t live forever. There’s is an expiration date. Today could be the last day.
This helps me appreciate every, single, second.
When one takes the time to think like this, it makes all the petty day-to-day shit seem unimportant (which it is, by the way). You get to embrace life. You get to be present and fully in it.
Acrylic on canvas panel, 9×12
©2023 Jeff Lung
From that point on, I started following Lex’s advice. Each day I take a few moments to accept that today might be the last. I think about my eventual death in a way that celebrates the now. It forces me to be more present.
Working as a portrait artist, people often ask me to paint those who are no longer with us. I sit right on death’s door when I create memorial paintings knowing that my time will expire too. Such contemplation gives me extra enthusiasm to not only enjoy painting what I’m painting, but to do the very best that I can, hoping that the fruits of my labor will result in joyous memories for as long as there are eyes to see.
This brings things full circle. Sure, I don’t have kids. I don’t have a family. But if I can leave some pretty painted pictures behind for others to see and remember their loved ones by, that’s how I can live on… in the eyes of others.
Do you think about death? How do you cope with the emotions that come with it? Tell me in the comments!